The Feeling That the Time for Doing Something Has Passed begins with a typical postcoital scene of a couple laying side by side in bed. Complete with a quirky, long-winded title, the film could be just one of a long list of thirtysomething coming-of-age indies where a writer draws inspiration from their life to tell a story of struggle in figuring out who one is and what one wants. But Ann (director-actor Joanna Arnow) quickly dispels this, climbing on top of her older partner, Allen (Scott Cohen), as he pretends to be asleep and begins dry humping him. “I like how you don’t care if I cum,” she says impassively. “It’s like I don’t even exist.”
In addition to introducing the sub/dom dynamics of Ann and Allen as “sex friends,” the sequence succinctly establishes Arnow’s sharp observations on relationships and everyday exchanges. These play out in short, deadpan vignettes, many of which function as standalone segments that swap out a traditional narrative structure for a series of jokes and punchlines. The editing, also done by Arnow, seems to try its best to enter scenes as late as possible and leave abruptly before they would conventionally end, allowing audiences the space to fill in the rest. This results in an experience that can initially be jarring, but Arnow manages to thread the needle enough where viewers can fall in line with its peculiar rhythm.
The haphazard flow reflects The Feeling…’s thoughts on the absurd roleplay in both sex and public life and the complex contradictions every person holds. In Ann’s quest to sort herself out – we meet her as she’s stuck in a bland, soul-draining office job and a relationship with Allen that’s not going anywhere – she makes changes only to later revert to previous behaviors. Instead of framing Ann’s progression as an obvious transformation, Arnow smartly elects to stay true to real life and makes her central character inconsistent in her interactions and self-expression.
But this doesn’t mean that there is a lack of advancement present. Early on, when Allen yet again asks Ann her age and what college she went to, she registers that she and Allen barely know anything about each other after nine years. She gets another warning after she receives an award from work marking a year at the company when she has actually been there for three, leading to the realization that time is slipping through her fingers. This subtly sparks her into life, and later, we see Ann demonstrate agency in her BDSM relationships with other men, knowing when to leave when things aren’t working out. This bleeds into her daily life as she protests against excessive supervision at work and accepts mantras of power and self-control in her yoga sessions.
However, the film feels like it takes too long to get here. The emotional detachment can wear thin and the comedy doesn’t always land, occasionally going for the easy payoff. Thankfully, this is mostly ameliorated when Ann meets Chris (Babak Tafti) and builds a different kind of connection with him. As Ann opens up, we start to see that her experience in BDSM relationships has helped her be able to express her thoughts and feelings honestly to a partner. What follows is some standard rom-com sequences, which, with the preceding events, is perhaps not expected, but Ann’s developing understanding of her own self-worth feels genuine.
The Feeling… is a confident and skillful debut. There are layers left open to interpretation such as how all of Ann’s masters appear to be more wealthy than she is or that her sexual kinks don’t go away when she enters a more traditional relationship. Even more importantly, the film has a distinct personality and, through its humor, uncovers a remarkable amount of sensitivity in its protagonist. Although it may not be for those less susceptible to its eccentricities, The Feeling… has more going for it than most modern indies.
Photo courtesy of Magnolia Pictures
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